Sunhuivchai's application.

**OOC portion**

Steam username: 3.14

SteamID: STEAM_0:0:30547503

Ban history: No.

Past RP experience: I played alot of RP servers and not only HL2RP.

Past CP experience: None.

RP example:
John McCat approaches the CP.
MPF-C18.05.12345: Yes citizen.
John McFly: There a man trying to climb the walls! Follow me I'll show you.
MPF-C18.05.12345 Walks after the man.
**After walking to a point where you can see the walls he notices a man climbing on the wall**
MPF-C18.05.12345 radios "Need assistance next to the Rations area."
MPF-C18.05.12345 runs toward the wall.
MPF-C18.05.12345: You! Get down immediately.
David McDog jumps down from the wall.
**Another CP appears.**
MPF-C18.02.12346: What is the problem over here?
MPF-C18.05.12345: This man was climbing on the walls.
Ok, I'll take it from here.
MPF-C18.05.12345 walks away.
MPF-C18.02.12346: Citizen.
MPF-C18.02.12346: Apply!
David McDog says "David McDog, 123456."
MPF-C18.02.12346: Face the wall.
MPF-C18.02.12346 Attempts to tie the man *resist?*
[LOCAL OOC] David McDog: No.
MPF-C18.02.12346 Searches the man.
MPF-C18.02.12346: Looks like some one is in trouble...
MPF-C18.02.12346 radios " I found a man climbing on the walls that was carrying a gun. I'll bring him over."
MPF-C18.02.12346: suspect prepare to receive civil judgment.
MPF-C18.02.12346 hits the man till he's unconscious. And drags him to the interrogation room.
MPF-C18.02.12346: I brought him for the interrogation. He was climbing the walls and he had a gun on him.
MPF-C18.01.12347: Ill take it from here...

Character backstory:
I was born in a small village in 09/01/1992. My parents died in front of my eyes as they were shot outside of a theater by a thief who asked for their money and they didn't have any on them. I lived alone from this day and I started studying in the local school and got to be a great student with high grades. Then I started studying about engineering and I really loved every thing mechanic. at age 17 I made my own engine.

But as time flew by and and I got older and the village turned in to a small town name after the great king Loc Heim I started working in the small garage and I learned about engines and cars. I was so interested that I declared a goal for himself earn enough and go to the big city to learn about engineering and become an engineer.

As I made enough money the great war has begone. The war of Loc Heim! The times were rough and no one could get in or out and I was forced to join the army. In the army I learned a lot about engineering, I learned everything from weapons to machines that started appearing in the town like auto turrets that were posted around the city. Without him the town would be takes along time ago as he was the one keeping the machines and vehicles alive...
But it wasn't enough. They had to surrender.
The town was taken and it was the first time I saw the Combines. They raided the city and enslaved everyone.
I then woke up on a train to city 18 with my head hurting like it was hit, the last thing I remember is how the Combines were coming in to the city...


**IC portion**

Name: Sunhuivchai Weng.

Age: 21.

Birth year: 09/01/1992.

Past crimes: none.

Medical/Engineering experience: Yes [X] No [ ]

If yes, which (or both) and explain:Engineering.
I was a great student with high grades and I continued to study engineering till I finished school.
I then worked in a garage where I learned about engines and cars.
Every other small thing I learned on the way with my career.

Why do you want to join the Union?: I always wanted to be a CP. Even when I was a child, I wanted to be a police man. I always was a loyalist and will stay a loyalist and the reason that I am trying so bad is because I want to join the Union. Joining the Union to me is to be proud of who you are and what you are!
And keeping the filth out of the streets is my dream.

Any other information you wish to share?: None.

Pretty good, problem is your In character portion is not in character. You need to act as if you are Alex. Also, put your last name and don't say "In character backstory" because it is your character filling out that part.

So I need to change it from He was a frog to I was a dog?

Some spelling mistakes here and there.

Your backstory sounds like the Batman plot, but it seems interesting.

I saw you mingegrab a piece of paper used for RP today and run away with it.

Sorry, but Neutral until you improove your skills.

I fixed it.

The only batman thing are the killed parents. Didnt have anything say about parents so I killed them in the story.

And I didn't minge anything o.O. I was standing near the person who minged it actually. I was near the man who did it so I know what you are talking about. One of the admins said that it wasnt me when I asked in on the server. He said he saw it and it was a black guy. My IC char is white :/
I actually was going to read that paper and some one else minged it. You can check the logs "I said picks the paper and runs away with it" but some one took it before I pressed enter. So its actually wouldnt be a mingegrab as I ICly declared it and didnt actually do it.....

Oh alright. Let's see what else is wrong.

Quote :

If yes, which (or both) and explain:Engineering.
Well its all in the cherecter's back story.

That needs to be fixed, as your char's application is separate from yours, the player's. So you will need to restate the explanation for your engineering skills using first person narration, instead of saying 'It's in the character's backstory'. Fix that and you get my support.

lol you changed pic.

It will be done in a couple of minutes.
Please check again in about 20 mins :>

FIXED.

"I learned about guns and machines from the army as I was the head of the mechanic devision."

This sounds a bit.. too overpowered.

Well as I look at it, it does :/
Let me fix it a bit. Done.
But it wont help me ICly in anyway.

Okay. I edited it and erased the 'Engineering devision' thingy. You have my support.

Concomise wrote:

Oh alright. Let's see what else is wrong.

Quote :

If yes, which (or both) and explain:Engineering.
Well its all in the cherecter's back story.

That needs to be fixed, as your char's application is separate from yours, the player's. So you will need to restate the explanation for your engineering skills using first person narration, instead of saying 'It's in the character's backstory'. Fix that and you get my support.

Ya I said that too, anyway you have my support now.

BTW I got accepted :$

mangaluli wrote:

BTW I got accepted :$

Alright, congrats I guess... Don't know why no one put it...

mangaluli wrote:

**OOC portion**

Steam username: 3.14

SteamID: STEAM_0:0:30547503

Ban history: No.

Past RP experience: I played alot of RP servers and not only HL2RP.

Past CP experience: None.

RP example:
John McCat approaches the CP.
MPF-C18.05.12345: Yes citizen.
John McFly: There a man trying to climb the walls! Follow me I'll show you.
MPF-C18.05.12345 Walks after the man.
**After walking to a point where you can see the walls he notices a man climbing on the wall**
MPF-C18.05.12345 radios "Need assistance next to the Rations area."
MPF-C18.05.12345 runs toward the wall.
MPF-C18.05.12345: You! Get down immediately.
David McDog jumps down from the wall.
**Another CP appears.**
MPF-C18.02.12346: What is the problem over here?
MPF-C18.05.12345: This man was climbing on the walls.
Ok, I'll take it from here.
MPF-C18.05.12345 walks away.
MPF-C18.02.12346: Citizen.
MPF-C18.02.12346: Apply!
David McDog says "David McDog, 123456."
MPF-C18.02.12346: Face the wall.
MPF-C18.02.12346 Attempts to tie the man *resist?*
[LOCAL OOC] David McDog: No.
MPF-C18.02.12346 Searches the man.
MPF-C18.02.12346: Looks like some one is in trouble...
MPF-C18.02.12346 radios " I found a man climbing on the walls that was carrying a gun. I'll bring him over."
MPF-C18.02.12346: suspect prepare to receive civil judgment.
MPF-C18.02.12346 hits the man till he's unconscious. And drags him to the interrogation room.
MPF-C18.02.12346: I brought him for the interrogation. He was climbing the walls and he had a gun on him.
MPF-C18.01.12347: Ill take it from here...

Character backstory:
I was born in a small village in 09/01/1992. My parents died in front of my eyes as they were shot outside of a theater by a thief who asked for their money and they didn't have any on them. I lived alone from this day and I started studying in the local school and got to be a perfect student*. Then I started studying about engineering and I really loved every thing mechanic. at age 10 I made my own engine**.

But as time flew by and and I got older and the village turned in to a small town name after the great king Loc Heim I started working in the small garage and I learned about engines and cars. I was so interested that I declared a goal for himself earn enough and go to the big city to learn about engineering and become an engineer.

As I made enough money the great war has begone. The war of Loc Heim! The times were rough and no one could get in or out and I was forced to join the army. In the army I learned a lot about engineering, I learned everyting from weapons to machines that started appearing in the town like auto turrets that were posted around the city. Without him the town would be takes along time ago as he was the one keeping the machines and vehicles alive...
But it wasn't enough. They had to surrender.
The town was taken and it was the first time I saw the Combines. They raided the city and enslaved everyone.
I then woke up on a train to city 18 with my head hurting like it was hit, the last thing I remember is how the Combines were coming in to the city...

* A perfect student? I think that's a bid too much.
** At age 10? I doubt that is actually possibly.


**IC portion**

Name: Sunhuivchai Weng.

Age: 21.

Birth year: 09/01/1991. (Does not match backstory)

Past crimes: none.

Medical/Engineering experience: Yes [X] No [ ]

If yes, which (or both) and explain:Engineering.
I was a perfect student and I continued to study engineering till I finished school.
I then worked in a garage where I learned about engines and cars.
Every other small thing I learned on the way with my career.

Why do you want to join the Union?: I always wanted to be a CP. Even when I was a child, I wanted to be a police man. I always was a loyalist and will stay a loyalist and the reason that I am trying so bad is because I want to join the Union. Joining the Union to me is to be proud of who you are and what you are!
And keeping the filth out of the streets is my dream.

Any other information you wish to share?: None.

You have a very, very few spelling mistakes, and you also have to take a look at what else I've put onto your application.

I fixed it.